My friend's husband sucks. Even though I only met him last night, I'm confident in my assessment of him. Of the many reasons why he sucks (his need to be the center of attention, his dismissal of her friends, the fact that he's a party pooper) there is one reason why he really sucks is this: he thinks it's ok to judge other people for what they eat. Out loud. Well, more specifically, he thinks it's ok to criticize the food choices of women.
Not cool, bro.
First off, let me say, I know we all judge what other people eat. We all inspect who's eating what when. But it takes a special person to actually say something out loud to someone they don't actually know.
Let me set the scene: Sitting outside at a lovely Greek restaurant on a very nice night in DC. A third friend and I are first to arrive (by at least 20 minutes, and we know this), so we order drinks. I also order hummus because a) it's delicious and b) I'm hungry. Also, last time I checked, hummus was not a food that generally garnered disapproving comments. So I thought...
People start to arrive. Above-mentioned d-bag arrives. Other people order food and drinks. Hummus is offered to the table. Here's where things go wrong. I am eating my hummus with the bread provided and there's approximately 1/2 a pita left in the basket. Out of two originally brought. I am, I think, minding my own business when friend's husband says snidely "Do you want us to get you more bread or are you done eating."
I say "Do you have a problem with what I'm eating?" Then, trying to lighten the mood I add "I do love carbs, haha."
He goes "Yea, that is a lot of carbs." And then casts that side-long judgmental glance at my plate. Then, and this is where it gets good, I say "Well, that sangria has a lot of carbs. Are you saying that's better?" And he simply says "Yes, yes I am."
WTF dude. I don't even know you. And you're going to (stupidly) tell me that booze (not just booze, sangria) is better for me than hummus. Who is this guy??!! Anyone who's ever thought about dieting knows that alcohol is worse for your your diet than almost any food.
But, more importantly, what man, no, what person, thinks it's ok to judge someone else's food choices to their face. I'm not training to be an elite athlete or trying to be a movie star. This guy isn't anyone to me. So why would he think this is ok?
I'm mad just thinking about it. But it also makes me think about whether I judge people's food choices. Now, what this guy didn't know was that I hadn't eaten dinner. I'd been on a semi-awkward date where we split an ahi tuna appetizer. So, considering what I'd already eaten in the day, a nice hummus dish was perfect. That guy had just come from a steak dinner, so maybe my dish didn't appeal to him, but I certainly wasn't asking his input on it.
There's always extenuating circumstances. I didn't feel compelled to explain mine to him, but maybe before I judge other people, I'll think about what I don't know. And keep my opinions to myself.
And, yea, I finished the hummus.